15 For I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate. Romans 7:15 (ESV)
It’s a bit ironic that my Grace Confession today is “I’m weak.” Our Elder Team is currently in the middle of a 10 day fast and we are pressing into God with everything we have so we may experience Him and His move in a very supernatural way. This is not the time to be weak.
However, like Paul, there have been many, many, many times in my life that I have struggled to do what I felt was the right thing to do or what I felt God wanted me to do. I have been in vocational ministry for 25 years and there have been more times than not that I know I missed a blessing because I and my faith was weak. In the past, I have begun a season of fasting only to get to lunch and decide “maybe I can just do this fast thing for half-a-day.” Ugh! I hate when I do that. When I was addicted to tobacco for 27 years I quit at least 10,000 times only to eat a meal and decide my need for nicotine was far greater than my need for a healthy life. I don’t even have the time or space to go into all the times I wanted to say the right thing, not say the wrong thing, keep my mouth shut, not watch that movie, read my Bible, pray on a regular basis, start a regular exercise plan, lose those 30 pounds and on and on and on only to quit, give-up or choose another value in the moment of my weakness. Grrrr, why am I so weak?
Today, my weakness seems to take different shapes. I can go through a day full of strength, joy and praising God for everything He is doing in my life only to receive one negative word from someone and let it ruin my day and even week. I struggle taking my thoughts captive. I know I need to be stronger in this area, but I’m weak. Sometimes I dwell on a thought I know is not healthy and not productive in my walk with Jesus. I know in the moment I should call it down, take it captive, speak to that demon with truth and lay it at the feet of Jesus. But I’m weak. I carry it too long and I let it disrupt the rhythm of what God intended for me. I hate when I do that! I confess, I’m weak.
That’s my confession, but here’s my Grace Confession.
God showed me that in Romans 7 Paul was speaking of what it was like to live by the law of Moses. It depended entirely on self effort and the results would always be what the self created. He was wisely illustrating for us that it was a life that would always be weak.
I learned that in my own self efforts I would keep being disappointment by my inability to stay strong. I just couldn’t live this life that I felt God wanted me to live and that the church taught was my very basic responsibility to do. By Grace, God showed me I could NEVER be strong enough but in Jesus I would be strong enough to do anything!
Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, 2 because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit who gives life has set you free from the law of sin and death.
I can do all things through him who strengthens me.” Philippians 4:13. God showed me that my weakness is always exposed when I am trying do anything through my self-efforts. But when I rely on Jesus He has the strength to take those thoughts captive. All I must do is give it to Him by faith. God’s strength is perfect. There is no weakness in Him. When He thinks through me, chooses through me, decides through me, attempts through me, does through me, I can and will do anything. King David declared, “By your favor, O Lord, you made my mountain stand strong.”
My Grace Confession is this. I’m Weak but in Jesus my weaknesses means nothing because His strength does what I could never do. He has declared all new possibilities in my life! Give your weakness to Jesus and watch the results take place in your life, then you can live out the Jesus-kind of strength God intended for all of us!